Big Sister Blues.....
Well, it's been just over four weeks since Kjersten entered the world and she is doing great. For the most part, Ashlynn and Alec have adjusted well to their new baby sister. Whenever Alec is asked at school about his little sister, he gets a big grin from ear to ear. He loves her and says we can keep her, but he wouldn't mind if we sent the older one back. He kisses Kjersten every chance he gets and always wants to hug her before he goes to bed and when he wakes up every morning.
Ashlynn is wonderful with her little sister as well, but I think she is starting to feel a little jealous of baby Kjersten. Lately, she has been telling her friends at school that she is moving to Texas at springbreak so she can be with her dad which is not true. I can imagine that it is difficult for her to see her baby sister being held and loved by Mike and makes her yearn for her own dad to hold her and love her the same way. Surprisingly, she does not act negatively towards Mike and seems to be seeking his attention yet she hasn't tried to compete with her sister for his attention either. If anything, she has been a little more hostile towards me lately and I know that I have to make time to spend with her to help her feel more secure with her place in our family.
It's hard enough for any child to fit into a new blended family with "step' relatives and figure out how to be part of it without feeling like you're betraying your other half of the family. I'm sure it is hard for them to watch a new half-sibling come into the world who is part of a family they're not biologically related to and not feel jealous. I can imagine that even if they don't feel it now, someday they might feel like they got jipped in life being born into a broken home. I can certainly say that I felt that way growing up too but there isn't anything any one of us can do about it. We all have to learn to live life with the cards we were dealt and move on with it. There is no sense in dwelling on things we can't change and as a parent, I find it difficult to teach to my kids. The reality is that we all have to learn that own our own and in our own way.
Ashlynn is wonderful with her little sister as well, but I think she is starting to feel a little jealous of baby Kjersten. Lately, she has been telling her friends at school that she is moving to Texas at springbreak so she can be with her dad which is not true. I can imagine that it is difficult for her to see her baby sister being held and loved by Mike and makes her yearn for her own dad to hold her and love her the same way. Surprisingly, she does not act negatively towards Mike and seems to be seeking his attention yet she hasn't tried to compete with her sister for his attention either. If anything, she has been a little more hostile towards me lately and I know that I have to make time to spend with her to help her feel more secure with her place in our family.
It's hard enough for any child to fit into a new blended family with "step' relatives and figure out how to be part of it without feeling like you're betraying your other half of the family. I'm sure it is hard for them to watch a new half-sibling come into the world who is part of a family they're not biologically related to and not feel jealous. I can imagine that even if they don't feel it now, someday they might feel like they got jipped in life being born into a broken home. I can certainly say that I felt that way growing up too but there isn't anything any one of us can do about it. We all have to learn to live life with the cards we were dealt and move on with it. There is no sense in dwelling on things we can't change and as a parent, I find it difficult to teach to my kids. The reality is that we all have to learn that own our own and in our own way.
posted by Mike and Jenny Olson | 10:17 PM
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